Indore Diaries : 2....Martian Pranav and the plight of Ravi Kumar

Bhaiya mujhe bachaa lo please, said Ravi Kumar to me with a voice that was filled with horror. He looked petrified with sweat rolling down over his face. He was breathing hard and could barely speak. He started crying and requested me to speak to Pranav.

Ravi Kumar had come from Andhra Pradesh to pursue his studies in Electronics Engineering. He was our junior and he was a die-hard fan of Chiranjeevi. He was also fond of eating Rice more than Chapattis and took tremendous pains to convince people about Chiranjeevi’s monopoly in the Telugu film industry.

That day he had ticked off Pranav as I could sense that from his voice. Pranav could not stand his Chiru-Puran and often disapproved his remarks.

I was more amused than surprised when the story unfolded. Pranav had convinced Ravi Kumar that he belonged to a different planet, Mars. Ravi Kumar was not aware that even NASA’s mission to Mars was in it’s nascent stage. The tales of Chiranjeevi was beyond the logics of Science and Technology and the fact that Pranav was a Martian, was easily digested by Ravi Kumar.

With all the science-fiction tales supporting the existence of aliens and the popularity of the movie MIB(Men in Black), it was not difficult for Ravi Kumar to conveniently mix reel life and real life .

So Pranav had unmatched extra-terrestrial powers that could destroy Earth and turn everything to ashes in one minute. Martian Pranav was unhappy with the system as a whole that had treated him unceremoniously. So he was about to destroy Earth and move on to pastures new. After all there are millions of galaxies in this universe.

Ravi Kumar bowed down in front of me and requested me to speak to Pranav so that we could stop the destruction of our planet, yet again after Will Smith. He had not visited his parents lately and felt sad that he was not with them during his last moments. He also wanted to meet his girlfriend before the annihilation takes place.

So convinced was he with Pranav’s histrionics that he forgot Chiranjeevi for a while and prayed for his safety and well being. Pranav had found out an absolutely out of the world way to silence Ravi Kumar’s senseless blabberings.And we were happy with yet another funny incident taking place, just when everything seemed boring in the hostel.

I told Ravi Kumar that to save the planet we have to pay a heavy price. We have to be selfless and should imbibe a sense of sacrifice. We should never speak about Chiranjeevi again and should never spearhead campaigns of Rice-eating as the Martians are likely to be ticked off with such activities.

Only then Pranav will be pacified and would return to live with us. Ravi Kumar readily agreed and was even ready to go back to his hometown to spread this awareness.

For the next seven days he would look at Pranav with uncertainty. He was worried if Pranav was a Martian of his words. I convinced him and finally we got rid of all the beastly tales of Chiranjeevi and the different ways of eating Rice.